Status Symbol

Why is it so hard to come up with a facebook status update?

All I need is something witty and meaningful, but just mysterious enough to get people interested and commenting. C’mon, Lainie. It’s not that hard. Just tell people what you’re feeling. Tell them how you are. Tell them what you’re doing. Most thoughts get censored:

Whatif I say I’m sitting on my chair typing? (True, but too boring.)

Whatif I mention that dinner just isn’t agreeing with me? (Um, eww.)

Whatif I mention that I wish I were more granola than I was? (Just to confirm that I’m weird.)

Whatif I mention I’m feeling lonely right now? (No way, you sound needy.)

Whatif I say I wish people called me more often? (Oh, great. Even MORE needy.)

Sometimes I like the challenge of it all. I mean, how DO you summarize yourself in a few short phrases for 300 of your closest friends to see? Kind of exciting for the writer in me. It’s poetry, in a way. (Check for my next poem-post, coming soon.)

But no matter how I slice it, those updates are all tiny pieces of me. I’m happy to put a little bit out there, but how far do I go? What all do people need to know? Certainly I want to share. How much honesty can people take, though?

I do wonder. There have to be other people like me. I’ve got to believe there are more people who see a difference between the selves they think they are, and the selves they put up out there that little box.

Here’s my new whatif: Whatif we censored ourselves less? Whatif we exposed ourselves for the funny / crazy / sad / gross / needy creatures we know ourselves to be? Would we grow together? Or would we run and hide?

Until then, maybe I’ll just be “ready for a day with her boys tomorrow.”

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